Sunday, March 11, 2007


A few days back my friend had asked me to jot a few words on INFIDELITY. Days went by, to weeks to almost a month and a half. I still have not the yearning to really write about it. If any of you readers have faced it or even practiced it, which I’m sure most of you have, you definitely know that the effect of our enzymic chemicals acting upon us. Be it testosterone or oestrogen or any other yet undiscovered. No wonder as the eccentric Einstein once said ‘Love is chemistry, Sex is Physics.’ And by all means I abide by it.

Physical attraction can disguise itself as love. And we humans are very adept in reassuring ourselves that is ‘make-believe’. A harmless wink, a teasing glance, a subtle twist of lips------- the whole kinesis of the human body is inclined to be ruled by the chemicals within us. INFIDELITY happens when the chemicals take over the physical. In other words, when greed, lust, sloth and likewise – preside over and defy – all logical reasoning within us. All of a sudden the risks are no more the ‘risks’. It’s a mad rush. I am not trying to be too articulate with words, but I’m saying in a blatantly practical way. INFIDELITY is the seed borne by us. The seed is dormant, its never inactive. Only sanity lies in holding to the ‘faith’.

You will see that even religions might allow polygamy but that’s within an institution. Out side of marriage, in a physical relationship, a woman will always be a mistress. Extra-marital affairs. Hmm…sad, though not in bed. One fling is fine. Two One-night-stands are ok. But an organized meet-up between consenting adults is something approached in cold blood. The mad rush becomes a steady flow. None of the two really thinks of his/her home or family. All they need is pleasure and someone who they think listens to them. After all we are also social ANIMALS.

INFEDILITY can also be very addictive. When the juices flow steadily. Some people are driven by thrills of the flesh, some for mere recognition in the other person’s eyes, some to be loved by so many at the same time, some to kill boredom because they think they are not skilled in any other way, still there are scores of people driven towards infidelity for something as harmlessly dangerous as the curiosity arising out of an meagre infatuation.

However, there is no need to lose hope though. There are people who still are staunch believers of monogamy. Those who value the value of ‘being faithful’. A person would never get ‘carried away’ if his will does not give in. No matter how intoxicated, depressed, unhappy and dissatisfied he/ she is in life with their current partner. A very simple logic would be, you are always free to walk out of the other person’s life and then start a new relation. Then why handle parallel lives and incompetent wives?

The immediate remedy is to dissociate and try not to brood. Followed by starting out afresh. This would please you, her and Einstein.

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