Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Malice in Ponderland













This is not a review. This is just a view.

Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland is a big callous blunder. A far cry from Edward Scissorhands or the classy dark Sleepy Hollow, this one's not even close to Ed Wood, Willy Wonka, Big Fish or even Sweeney Todd! I would rather enjoy far out watching 'Corpse Bride' - an animated Depp rather than the aggressively promoted Mad Hatter, who hardly makes an impact in the narrative.

Whatever happened to Johnny Depp?? Jack Sparrow has rubbed furiously off his demeanor and all facial twitches resemble either a Willy Wonka or again a Sparrow. It seems he is living off his characters from films and carrying them forth to the next one. A very scary thought.

Burton and his lysergic diethylamide-induced factory has churned out a total waste of brilliance and economics behind this film. Every frame, every shot reminds you of one of the numerous 'unending falling-into-depth-less-pits', slaying of fire-gamma rays fuming dragon like creatures, futile humor lines and the list will put you to sleep even before Alice does. Infact Wonderland itself looks like an abandoned remains of a set from some old Burton movie.

The supporting cast are overplayed, underplayed, overacted, all around a Taylor Swift types who has played Alice (Mia Wasikowska = who?). Anne Hathaway's frustration of not getting better roles is apparent on screen as the perpetually stoned White Queen. Helena Bonham Carter has been overplayed to the hilt as the Red Queen and the ugliness is over the top. Other characters are as irritating as the 3D glasses.

After being terribly depressed, by the time I walked out of the theater, I overheard things from the crowd like 'Narnia should be in 3D', 'Harry Potter rocks any day', 'Mad Hatter looked like Willy Wonka's acid trip gone bad', of some that I can remember.

Trust me the animated and movie versions of Alice which we saw on our DoorDarshan sets during the summers were a tasteful lot. They were far out than Burtonscape.

It is clear that Burton seriously overestimates himself, which is not bad...but dude we are not on acid!!

4 comments:

Ria Ghosh said...

dude... hats off.. i agree with each n every word... it ws jst tooooooooooooo boring.. n mainly..burton shud ve taken a better actress as alice.. she has no expression.. no fear no surprise..nothing...plain face thruout the film..
and alice n mad hater er closeness n fondness..ki kore holo..kichu bojha gelo naa.. i mean they gt so close tht it ws hard fr her to go back..shit..wen it happened???
i dono..i tried to taek interest fr depp sake.. but shit..too much of drama n bullshit..
and srslyy.. the concept of leavibng the film open ended.. ws a disaster coz there cnt a sequel of this movie..hahaah..it ws sucha disaster.. NARNIA WS MUCH BETTER..

Ria Ghosh said...

And i wana addd.. that.. red queen should learn from the White WITCH (narnia)
i dono why people were so scared of that idiot(literally) red queen.. shez so dumb..
neway.. i still love depp :D

...Demonos said...

Of Course. Depp is Depp no two heads bout it.

Actually Tim Burton's head is growing bigger and older.

VG said...

Nice Post